The Building Storm

Thunderstorm by enrique lopez garre

Sometimes in a relationship we don’t act on things that are bothering us. We let it slide and hope it will sort itself out. Sometimes we don’t want to have difficult conversations. Sometimes we don’t want to face difficult situations. Sometimes we don’t want to feel the rubbish emotions. Sometimes we don’t want to admit what’s really happening. 

Do you feel like your world is being thrashed by a thunderstorm? It seems everything in life is being battered and forced into chaos. It is stirring up all sorts of things. Emotions are high and you are being forced to act. 

A thunderstorm is just energy that’s built up and needs to be dissipated. 

When these thunderstorms come up in our life, it is usually because our emotions and resistances have been building up, not getting the chance to release. We are forced into doing something. 

I have seen it time and time again in clients, in my own life, in my friends’ lives, where we are pushed and pushed until we do something different and it can seem like our life is crashing around us. 

It could be that your relationship has lost its spark and feels like a nothing relationship, where you feel distant from each other and you are starting to look outside your relationship for what you desire and need, and neither you nor your partner are facing it or doing something about it. 

It all builds up until eventually that thunderstorm wakes up and forces you to face it and do something about it. Like a thunderstorm the chaos can appear out of nowhere, suddenly there. 

It feels horrible while you are in that thunderstorm. It can be a rollercoaster of emotions, from heartbreaking to fear to anger to relief to love to everything in between, wanting to escape the situation, like your world is crumbling. 

But you know what? A thunderstorm passes. It eventually runs out of energy and can’t keep going. When it passes, you will see what is no longer needed in your life, what is strong remains and what isn’t can be got rid of or improved. 

If your relationship is going through this thunderstorm or has just gone through it, look at what is becoming obvious as no longer needed and what is staying strong. This thunderstorm might be the very thing that your relationship needed to force you both to look at what is happening, to remind you to see what needs to stop, what is solid between you and what needs work to improve the quality of your relationship. 

It might also be the very thing your relationship needed for it to end. Not all relationships last forever and if the time has come to part, then it is important for both of you to be able to leave (obviously this is better when it isn’t a hostile break up, but sometimes that’s unavoidable), in any case, it is better to be apart than be in a relationship you hate. 

So, if you are finding you’re in the middle of that thunderstorm and it’s feeling tough, reach out to me. It will pass. And there are coaches like me who are here to support you through it. 

If you are at the end of that thunderstorm and are ready to work on your relationship and need a helping hand, again, get in touch. That is what I am here for. 

I’m going to say it one last time – all thunderstorms pass – know that you will get through this and come out better for it (even if you can’t see that yet).

Go easy on yourself and contact me if you are struggling through this.

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