Questioning your partner’s loyalty?

Woman sitting on coach with laptop but staring off into space concerned.
Photo by Mimi Thian on Unsplash

I was driving to the vets on Wednesday and I was listening to Nina Nesbitt’s song Loyal To Me and the lyrics went:

“Yeah, if you have to question
Is he loyal to me?
Well then, he’s probably not
And you should probably leave”

This got me thinking (don’t you love the random places inspiration comes from?). There is truth in this that if you are questioning your partner’s loyalty then something is going on. 

Often we get a gut instinct about these things from our partner’s behaviour; the way they treat us, the words they use or changes in their behaviour, etc. If something is going on outside the relationship and you are questioning their loyalty there is a chance they are not being loyal. 

If your gut instinct is saying they are cheating, chances are they are. 

I remember when my ex was sexting other women and his behaviour changed. Suddenly his phone was superglued to him. He would never leave it, even took it to the shower with him (which he didn’t do before). One time he dropped his phone and panicked to pick it up before I saw the screen. 

This was one of the noticeable differences. My intuition was ringing alarm bells! This made me question him and take action to do something about the situation. 

However, it isn’t that simple. Sorry!

There are times when someone questions their partner’s loyalty due to their own insecurities, fears, past experiences, basically their resistances. 

I have had clients who have worried about their partner’s loyalty but their partner’s behaviour wasn’t suspicious or changed. They felt this way because of their resistances. 

Sometimes it was a limiting belief, like not deserving that kind of love, not being worthy or good enough for a partner that is loyal. Sometimes it was because they had been cheated on before so were extra suspicious of everything so no matter what the person did, they would turn it into a suspicious behaviour. Sometimes they felt so insecure and had so much fear, that it was easier to find a reason to push the partner away than face what they were feeling. 

If you are in a situation and you are questioning your partner’s loyalty, explore where this feeling is coming from, what other thoughts or memories are getting triggered. If it is a resistances, chances are it will be accompanied by negative emotions, thoughts and/or memories of past experiences. 

If it is more a gut instinct, you’ll feel that in the body in a different way. Personally I feel this very strongly in my gut area and chest area, and comes with a deep knowing. I know other people feel their gut instinct slightly differently. 

There are also people who have blocked their gut instinct so much they don’t feel it anymore. If this is you, really important to start tuning into your gut instinct. A lot of work I do with clients on my Warrior Love Programme is to tap into their gut instinct and intuition. Reach out if you are struggling with this. 

If you realise your resistances are being triggered, that needs to be worked on. I can help you with this. All my work is about tuning into your resistances and learning how to let them go and being in your positive energy, energy that is aligned to you and who you are and what you desire. 

Leaving those resistances unchecked means they will continue to affect you (and you may not even notice how they are affecting you) and this can have devastating effects on your relationship and any future relationships.

Confident woman with sunglasses on and smiling.
Photo by Matthew Hamilton on Unsplash

When you work on the resistances, it allows you to notice when you get triggered and to see situations from a different perspective. It also means you are more secure in yourself.

As February is love month, I have a special offer for you. 😍 A 90 minute 1:1 coaching session for £75 (worth £149).

If you are ready to start working on yourself so you can be confident and secure in yourself and bring that to your relationship or future relationship, then book yourself in for a session. This offer will only be running in February.

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