Am I too fat to find love?

Are you too fat to find love? Weight is a big concern that comes up when I’ve been working with clients. It even shows up for the people who are fit and feel confident in their body, there will be that one part of their body they dislike and feel self-conscious about, and it is affecting how they feel about themselves.

So many times I’ve heard “I’ll start dating once I lose some weight” or “I hate my belly. I feel so self-conscious about it. I don’t want a guy to see it” or “I just wish I was thinner” or “guys won’t like me because I’m not thin enough”.

Woman's measuring her waist with measuring tape, wondering if she is too fat to find love. Photo by Fuu J on Unsplash
Photo by Fuu J on Unsplash

Body weight has little to do with finding love. Attractiveness is subjective, and different people are attracted to different body types. It’s important to remember that love is not solely based on physical appearance (yes, it plays a part in it, but it isn’t the only thing).

Genuine connections are built on shared values, interests, emotional compatibility, and mutual respect. By focusing on nurturing these qualities within yourself and being open to meeting new people, you increase your chances of finding a loving and fulfilling relationship.

Instead of focusing on what your body isn’t, focus on self-love and self-acceptance, regardless of your size. (Also, check out my blog on how what you focus on it more of what you will get. If you only focus on what your body isn’t, that is the only thing you will notice.) When you feel confident and comfortable in your own skin, it can positively impact your interactions with others and increase your chances of forming meaningful connections.

Rather than worrying about your weight, concentrate on maintaining a healthy lifestyle that promotes your overall well-being. Engage in activities that you enjoy, eat a balanced diet, and prioritize self-care. By taking care of yourself and feeling good about who you are, you’ll radiate confidence, which can make you more attractive to potential partners.

Confidence is so attractive and will shine through. Everyone has something about their body they dislike, even the most body positive people. Focusing on what you do love about your body and yourself, can help shift that focus. So when you date, you aren’t hiding your body (and this can be an unconscious thing, your body language will be hiding), you are open and confident.

Photo by Jade Destiny on Unsplash
Photo by Jade Destiny on Unsplash

And chances are your date won’t see the things you feel self-conscious about, or maybe that’s exactly the part of you they love. Attractiveness is more than looks, so let your personality shine through.

I know this can be hard when we live in a world where you are judged on your pictures on a dating app, but there has to be a level of trust that the right person will love you no matter what.

If you are struggling with this and wondering “am I too fat to find love?”, book a call with me and let’s explore what might be beneath this worry. One of my clients who didn’t want to date until she lost weight realised that the deeper block was actually that she didn’t feel good enough. When we dealt with that, she released that worry about not being the right size and started dating with excitement.

Remember, everyone deserves love and happiness, regardless of their body shape or size. Focus on cultivating a positive mindset, embracing your unique qualities, and engaging in activities that bring you joy. When you project self-love and confidence, you increase the likelihood of finding someone who appreciates and loves you for who you truly are.

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